Sometimes you feel sad or upset by the behavior that had another person with you but you don't realize and think that is not about what that person does or says, it is about how you decide that that affect you or no. You might be wondering: how is that? Well, as I said in the previous article we don’t have control over other people actions but we have control of our thoughts and feelings. We can decide how we feel.
It would be easier and we would feel better if when we receive an offensive comment from someone we just abandon the learned behavior of choosing feeling bad and create the habit of deciding that neither his words nor his actions affect us.
When people try to make you feel bad by their actions just look at them, smile and think that that is their opinion but not what you really are. If you caught yourself accepting what they say and you start to feel bad, change your thought and choose to feel good.
Taking some examples of the author Wayne Dyer we can see that most phrases we say announce that we are not responsible for what we feel and that we always blame others for it, but if these words were written correctly it will clearly demonstrate the opposite:
1. The phrase "You offended me" could be changed to "I'm offended by the things I said to myself about how you react to me."
2. The phrase "You make me feel bad" for the phrase "I made me feel bad."
3. The phrase "You make me sick", for the phrase "I am sick myself".
4.The phrase "I'm just upset and do not ask me to explain to you why," for the phrase "I have decided to feel upset because I can usually manipulate others with my anger because they think I have the control."